Everythings An Illusion
by LyricLover
Summary: All Time Low/SAW FanFiction (unfamous version) Posting New Chapters will be posted when they are completed! Make sure to leave comment about what you think!
1. Chapter 1: Alive

I lay in the grass, soaking in the sun rays that rested upon my skin. It feels nice to just be able to relax, to just let go of all the things that had happened in the past year; all the broken hearts, tears, death, fights, love, stress, and etc. I never used to be this relaxed but it's amazing how a couple new people and a life changing event could change that. I remember it all like it was just a dream I had the previous night…. I woke up at my usual 5:30am to get ready for school. I'm glad that this is my last year of high school; I don't know how much more I could take. I don't know why I hate school so much, I guess it's just a teen thing. I stumbled out of bed and headed for the bathroom. I pulled the hair tie out from head and let my hair fall to its full extent. I stripped out of my pjs and turned the hot water on, my shower was long mostly because I just stood there and let the water run down my face. I reached out for the shower knob and turned the water off, the rest of morning was just as slow. When I arrived to school people seemed to be buzzing around a lot more than usual, I strolled up to my friends who were in their everyday circle formation. They seemed to be in deep conversation about something. "hey guys, was all the buzz about?" they all stopped to greet me but Jack was the first to respond. Jack was a funny character; he was tall and skinny but had the best sense of humor ever. "hey jay we were just talking about Berts party." Berts party was supposed to be the biggest party of the year. Everyone was invited even the freshman. Bert is in my 5th period and he always said that the one thing he wanted to do before he graduated was to throw the most kick-ass party. Suddenly knocking me out of my thoughts was Alex, he just so happens to be the one of my friends that I was madly in love with. I dont know why its just one of those feelings that you have for someone that never goes away. But he has a rep to uphold, alex was never just the type to have an actual relationship or hardly a relationship at all, they were more like flings or hit 'em and quit 'ems if you must. I guess the ladies just love how his light brown hair falls perfectly in place and the rough look the stubble upon his face gives him. He always plays the "bad boy" role but i know hes a softie at heart. "so jay, you going to berts party next week or am I going to have to drag you by your hair" alex flashed a mischievous grin. "I don't know, you know im not one to party" "but jay you never do anything fun, your so uptight maybe a party is what you need to loosen you up a bit" casey chimmed in. Casey is my best friend, people always say that we look like we could be related but I think its just because we spend most of our time together. "I am not up tight" I mumbled out of annoyance. "alright guys, let her be she still has all week to decide if that's what she wants to do" thank god for zack, he always speaks up at just the right moment. The first bell rang, I walked slowly to first period and took my time. I took a seat in the back of class as normal and starred aimlessly off into space. My thoughts began to get the best of me. random useless thoughts ran in and out of head.

**Alex's POV….**

First period was a drag. As usual nobody ever paid attention to anything Mr. Man was saying, they all drift off and talk about other things that are somewhat Just as unimportant as whatever the hell Mr. Man was ranting about. "Attention Pine High school….." oh great the school announcements "today in sports both Jv and Varsity boys basketball team won against Analy, congrats…also is other school news we will be having a Turnabout, Ladies get to asking! Thanks for listening that will be all have a terrific Thursday!". From behind I felt a faint tapping

on my left shoulder. I turned around hoping it wasn't stalker sally trying to ask me to the dance, but instead it was just Amanda. "you should go with Jay" "I knew you were going to say that" Amanda along with Casey are probably the only people who want me and jay to be together. "well that's just my opinion but we should all hangout Saturday and go see a movie or something" for once Amanda actually had a good idea. "ya lets go, ive been wanting to see Dada for a while" "ok then its settled us and our friends are all going" The bell finally rang after a long 2 hour block period which seemed like it lasted all day. Amanda walked with me to break, shes a good friend someone I could always talk to, which is a hard quality to find in people now a days. I stood in our usual circle formation which now that I think about it seems kind of funny that we always stood this way.

**Amanda's POV…**

I walked with Alex out to break, and something seemed to be a little off when I mentioned Jay, I hope nothing wrong between them. They have their ups and downs but I know that eventually they will be together. From out the corner if my eye I saw Jay and immediately walked in her direction so that I could talk to her before she reached the group. "Hey so whats with you alex?" "nothing really, he just said that he likes me and cares for me but he also said that he isn't ready for a relationship…" you could tell by the look on Jays face that she was a little down about the situation. "what the hell? Well when will he be ready?" jay just shrugged and made her way past me, towards the guys. I followed behind her. Alex was telling everybody about the movies but the outcome wasn't that great, the only people that agreed to go were Casey, Jay, Me, and Alex. That's an ok combo for me anyways. Excusing us to 3rd was the bell. Gosh I really hate that thing, it gets really annoying. But to look on the better half of this is that I have zack in my class, the one guy that can take my breath away with just one glance. I haven't really have the balls to tell him how I feel, but I guess its better off that way. I wouldn't want to change the way things are now. "Hey Amanda, come sit with over here with me" I feel like my heart just dropped into my stomach,i went over sat myself next to zack. Me and him talked and goofed the whole period which happens to be the one reason I love this class.

**Zack's POV…**

Third period is always the best, when Amanda is around. I love the way her smile lights up the room. I really was starting to get feelings for her. I just couldn't figure out a way to tell her.I was never one with words or sharing how i feel, i like to keep things bottled up so i dont burden anyone with my problems. gave us the death stare as we talked, so amanda shushed me and i watched her attempt to remotly listen to whatever hathorn was thoughts of us being together over took my brain bad and good thoughts. I thought about what it would be like being with her and how I was going to tell her that i think im falling in love with her. But unfortuanly the good thoughts werent the only ones there. thoughts of what would happen if things between us ended on a bad note. it seems that the bad thoughts had won because i decided to keep my mouth shut. More endless thoughts carried through my brain...which wasted my whole class time and becasue i did nothing but think instead of do any work so now i have to serve a 2 hour detention after school. yay!

**Casey's POV...**

Something was up with jay with jay and I was determined to figure out twhat the hell it was. i pulled out a piece of scrap paper from my notebook and wrote: Are you ok?

jay: ehh could be better Me: whats wrong? Jay: just the usaul alex problems

Me: Do i need to open a can of whoop ass on him?

Jay: no! lol

Me: ok, so what up between you guys anyways

Jay: I told him how i really felt, you know that i like him and stuff, but all he said was that he likes me too but isnt ready for a relationship and that he dosent want to hurt me so hes going to try "changing" before he even thinks about a relationship.I understand but it leaves me in a complicated situation.

Me: thats sweet that he wants to change, but how dose that leave you in a compilcated situation?

Jay: because am i just supposed to wait until hes ready? and if i do, i dont want to be waiting forever. also what of he never changes and i wasted time waiting. or even worse what if this is just his way of letting me down easily?

Me: in my opinion he really dose care otherwise why would he waste his time making up lies? and plus if he didnt really care he would probably be dating some dumb brod by now.

Jay: ya i guess thanks. i just dont want to wait for something thats never going to come.

Me: dont worry he'll come around eventually. i promise.

It wasnt long until came and snatched the note from us and shreded it in his famous paper shredder. Jay and i both looked at eachother and bursted out with laughter, hawk wasnt to pleased with us and we both got two our of detention after school. great two more hours of school becasue 7 hours isnt enough already!

**Jay's POV...**

After getting hooked up with dentions from Hawk, my brains capicty was over riding with thoughts and came to the concluson that that i shouldnt worry and just whatever happens, happens. iturned to casey who had lightly hit my shoulder. she had a look on her face, like she had seen a ghost. When really she was starring at the new kid, who i found very attractive. Casey was awkwardly trying not stare by keeping her head on her me being me i took it upon my self to break the ice. "so do you guys know eachother?" i sat waiting to be answered. "ya he talks to my brother" casey hesitantly responded, but i could tell there was more to the story than that. "ya" Matt spoke up. his name was Matt Flyzik, what a weird last name. the table grew quite very quickly. when the bell rang both casey and matt took off without a word. i didnt need to put much thougth into it becasue i knew that i would find out my way to fourth alex had stopped me half way and told me that he need to talk to me because it s important. My gut was telling me that this wasnt going to end well.

**Jacks's POV...**

Damn it! i was late to class again. "mr. Barakat whats you excuse this time?" mr. chan was not happy about this. "well since my 3rd period is all the way across campus, its a very long was to go sir." i gave a pleading look hoping that would over look this. "jack it looks as if you'll be thinking of your next excuse in detention." i took my seat next to alex who was laughing at how stupid i must have looked. "so did you talk to her yet?" "no but i told her i had something important to tell her" alex was really pissing me off becasue he tells jay all this crap, and then never make s a move. when i know that he really does like her. "well you better do it soon, she wont wait forever" i could tell by the look in his face that i was right and it killed him inside thinking that jay could just give up on him. While he thinks of his situation i had bigger fish to fry. i had to find a way to tell casey that i like-like her.

**Rian's POV...**

Why am i always the middle man? i hate it, i always feel like they pressure me into picking sides. but i agree with both of them and see both of thier points. Alex dosent want a relationship at the moment and jay is tired of waiting. i mean if i had been waiting a whole year for someone i would just give uo as well, but if i didnt want to hurt someone i really cared about i wouldnt want to rush a relationship ethier. in my opinion the should just talk to eachother abouthtis instead of having be the little messenger , the things i think about in fifth period. I laid my head down and fell asleep, it doesnt really matter anyways because i wasnt really paying attention to what Mrs. Zims was saying. so i just slept fifth period away.


	2. Chapter 2: Falling Apart

**Jays POV...**

saturday was finally here. I had woken up early but in the best mood ever. I walked down the hall passing caseys room, i peaked my head in and she was sound a sleep. I flickered the lights on and off hoping that she would wake up. But she hardly moved. this was a challenge that i was willing to accept. i backed up a little preping my self so that i can fling myself in her direction. "fuck!" casey sat up and started beating me with her pillow. As we settled down we kinda just sat there for a while. "are you excited for the movies?" casey gave me this grin as if she was hinting to something. "ya i heard the movie was good" i played it off like i had no clue what she was talking about. "oh really? thats why your excited? it has nothing to do with alex or possibaly getting to sit next to him?" i could feel my cheeks heat up and turn pink. butterflies filled my stomach. "your dumb" was my only response to her. This is probably the third time i have gone to the movies with alex, and other friends of course. but my point is that for some reason everytime when i think about it or him, i began to feel like someone had knocked the wind out of me and my heart beats a million times faster. But i knew that i couldnt share my feelings with alex, let alone anyone because i knew thet exact responses that i would i get; "im not ready for a relationship" or "awww you guys are so cute". i got up from caseys bed and headed to the shower. i guess you could say that i was tired of hearing the same damn thing over and over again, i wish people were more 'DO' than they are 'TALK'.

**Alex's POV...**

I woke up late that day and not in the best of mood either. Its saturday which is usually mine, caseys, and jays movie day. jay. going to the movies with her was something that i enjoyed but i had a guilty feeling in my gut every time. i felt like i was leading her on. i feel the need to be cautious with every move i make. I really do like her, but am i really willing to risk everything? Im not good at having "good" relationships and she knows that. i just wish that she would move on because im no good for her, and i know i keep telling her that i was going to change but reality just punched me in the face that, it going to take a lot of work for whatever change im looking for to come. plus im not worth waiting for. Speak of the devil, jay just texted me asking to save her and amanda seats becasue they might be late. the Movies was my chance to be honest with her. so I replied with 'ok, and i need to talk to you after the movie'. I did my usaul "get ready" routine which was shower and get dressed. Nothing to exciting. I grabbed my keys and headed out the door. My drive seemed long, i turned on the radio and continued my peaceful drive. When i got to the movies, there was no sign of amanda or jay. i grabbed my phone to text jay that i was here but before i could hit send, icould hear my name being called from behind me. It was jay and amanda, i looked over in jays direction. It almost pained me to know that by the end of the night i was going to be the reason that the smile she always had would be gone and that i would be the reason for the rain drops on her cheeks even thought the sky is dry. "hey guys, caseys a no show" jay said with her head buried in her phone. "how come?" amanda asked while waiting for her popcorn. "she said she wasnt able to make it" i could that jay was a bit disappointed that casey wasnt coming.

-1hour later-

"holy crap! that was an intense movie" jay said we left the darkness of the theater. this was my que. "hey jay can i talk to you?" amanda began to follow as we walked to talk privatly. "here amanda take these quarters and go play a game" jay pulled the change from her pocket and watched amanda walk away before returning to me. "ok alex whats up?" "i've been thinking" "about what?" "our problem" "whats our problem?" jays facial expression went from happy to worried in a matter of seconds. "well we like eachother but idont want anything serious, you know im kool with like going on dates and stuff but i dont want a "girlfriend" because im not good at that kind of stuff and you know that." jays face began to worry me. i guess this wasnt as easy as i thought it would be.

**Jay's POV...**

WHAT THE HELL? So far im so confused. I thought that me and him were actually getting some where, there has to be more to what hes telling me. "Do you want me to move on? is that the point your trying to make?" Alex hesitated before answering "No and yes. i think that we should like eachother still, and still hang out but if want to do things with other guys i understand because im not really worth waiting for...im really fucked up and its going to take a very long time to fix myself. Im trying to be honest with you and plus your tired of waiting and its killing me seeing you so upset over this whole situation" Alex kept his stare locked on his sneakers. I didnt really know what to say. it hurt, more than anything before. the one guy that i want more than anything is telling me that hes no good. well who said i fucking wanted him to change anyways? i like him just the way he was and i dont give a shit what other said or how they felt about this situation. But for some reason i couldnt find the words to tell him that so i said something else. "I'm not up set nor was I ever upset about waiting, I willing to put in the effort and hard work because I believed in you I believed that you could change I even fought with amanda, jack, zack, and Casey because that didn't believe that you could ever change they thought all you were going to do was hurt me I was willing to wait for you I really was and I'm sorry for actually being the one person that thought you could really change so thanks for finally telling how you feel" i felt bad for putting our friends on the spot like that but im getting really sick and tired of people telling me that hes no good. im also sick of people trying to tell me how to feel about someone. Now that alex is telling me thats it not fair that i have to wait. but really its not fair that he stands there and tells me that he like me, while throwing everything we had away. "im sorry, i really do like you but i just thinks its unfair to you" i held back the tears that i felt coming. This was it, the end of Alex and I. "lifes unfair" those were my last words, turned on my heels on walked away. trying to grasp everything that happen. Amanda was alreadly in the car waiting for me. as soon as i got in and shut the door. i layed my head in the steering wheel and began to cry. Amanda didnt ask what was wrong, she handed me some tissues from the dashboard. I cleaned my self up and started the car. I told amanda the story in the car ride to her place. I pulled up to her place and put the car in park we both kind of just sat there trying to soak everything in. Amandas final words before leaving was; "i think that you guys should just date and work on every obstacle when you run into one...you guys deserve a chance." i drove away with that in mind. The quite was making me fell uncomfortable so i turned on the radio and my life story came on... (I Stay in love - Mariah Carey) _~Why do I stay Why do I stay in love? Oh, baby Baby, I stay in love with you Dying inside 'cause I can't stand itMake or break up, can't take this madness We don't even really know why All I know is, baby, I try and try so hard to keep our love alive If you don't know me at this point Then I highly doubt you ever will I really need you to give me That unconditional love I used to feel It's no mistaking, we're just erasing from our hearts and minds And I know we said let go but I kept on hanging on Inside I know it's over, you're really gone It's killing me 'cause there ain't nothing that I can do Baby, I stay in love with you And I keep on telling myself that you'll come back around And I try to front like, "Oh well," each time you let me down See I can't get over you now no matter what I do But baby, baby, I stay in love with you Na, na, na, na, na, na, na, naNa, na, na, na, na, na, na, naNa, na, na, na, na, na, na, na Baby, I stay in love with you It cuts so deep, it hurts down to my soul My friends tell me I ain't the same no more We still need each other when we stumble and fall How we gon' act like what we had, ain't nothing at all now Hey, what I wanna do is ride shotgun next to you With the top down like we used to hit the block, proud in the SUV We both know our heart is breaking Can we learn from our mistakes?I can't last one moment alone, now go I know We said let go but I kept on hanging onInside I know it's over, you're really gone It's killing me 'cause there ain't nothing that I can do Baby, I stay in love with you And I keep on telling myself that you'll come back around And I try to front like "Oh well," each time you let me down See I can't get over you now no matter what I do But baby, baby, I stay in love with you~_

**Alex's POV...**

What have i done?

**Casey's POV...**

(earlier that day)

Jay got up and walked torwards the shower. i headed over to my closet to get something to wear to the movies. While rummaging through my clothes, i had gotten a text message from Jack. He wanted me to meet him at the food court at the mall. i qiuckly got dressed and without telling jay, i left. On my way out i ran into Amanda who must have just got here. "hey casey, where you going?" "ummmm...i have some errands to run" "oh ok well are you going to be back in time for the movies?" "ya i'll meet you guys there." I dont why i couldnt just tell her that i was meeting jack. I felt bad for keeping things from Jay and Amanda, but i dont know of they would approve of whats going on. During my whole drive i was trying to think if i should just turn around or not...but i didnt, i pulled into the large parking garage and parked. I sat there for a minute. I looked at the entrance and saw jack standing there running his fingers through thick black hair. i got out walked to him. Before i could say anything He leaned in and kissed me. the softness of lips made my heart melt. I put my hand on his chest and pushed him away. "whats wrong casey?" jack looked confused "im tired of lying about whats going on here" "What do you mean?" "this whole secret relationship thing, Why cant we be together in the open?" "its just eaiser this way" jack looked off into the distance. "eaiser for you? because i want to be with you jack but not like this. you need to get you shit together" i turned to walk away but he had grabbed my arm. "i forgot to give this to you." he held out a cd, i didnt give it another look i just took it and shoved it on my bag and continued walking. I got in to the car and before driving off i pulled out the cd and read the writing on the cover. 'Our Songs' Tears fell from my eyes as i put the cd in. Of course the first song was Dirty Little Secret by All American Rejects. But the one song that had made smile was the last one, She will Be loved by Maroon 5. I texted jay that i wouldnt make it to the movies. I spent the whole night listening to that CD... I could hear the pieces of my heart drop to the ground. What Have i done?


	3. Chapter 3: Death Kissed Me

**Casey's POV...**

(earlier that day)

Jay go up walked towards the shower. I headed over to my closet to get something to wear to the movies. While rummaging through my clothes, I had gotten a text message from Jack. He wanted me to meet him at the food court at the mall. I quickly got dressed and without telling jay, I left. On my way out I ran into Amanda who must have just got here.

"hey Casey, where you going?"

"uhhhh...I have some errands to run"

"Oh ok well are you going to be back in time for the movies?"

"Ya I'll meet you guys there." I don't why I couldn't just tell her that I was meeting jack. I felt bad for keeping things from Jay and Amanda, but I don't know if they would approve of what's going on. During my whole drive I was trying to think if I should just turn around or not...but I didn't, I pulled into the large parking garage and parked. I sat there for a minute. I looked at the entrance and saw jack standing there running his fingers through thick black hair. I got out walked to him. Before I could say anything He leaned in and kissed me. the softness of lips made my heart melt. I put my hand on his chest and pushed him away.

"What's wrong Casey?" jack looked confused

"I'm tired of lying about what's going on here"

"What do you mean?"

"This whole secret relationship thing, why can't we be together in the open?"

"it's just easier this way" jack looked off into the distance.

"easier for you? because I want to be with you jack but not like this. you need to get you shit together" I turned to walk away but he had grabbed my arm.

"I forgot to give this to you." he held out a cd, I didn't give it another look I just took it and shoved it on my bag and continued walking. I got in to the car and before driving off I pulled out the cd and read the writing on the cover. 'Our Songs' Tears fell from my eyes as I put the cd in. Of course the first song was Dirty Little Secret by All American Rejects. But the one song that had made smile was the last one, She will Be loved by Maroon 5. I texted jay that I wouldn't make it to the movies. I spent the whole night listening to that CD...

**Narrators POV…**

Later on that night…

Jay was driving home with tears in her eyes. This was a feeling that she wished that she could ignore but her feelings for Alex we to strong. Jay was heading torwards an intersection. But she let her feelings get in the way and take up her attention. Her light turned red and she didn't care. She kept a steady pace straight and didn't stop. Half way through the intersection a giant white Toyota wasn't paying close attention as well. Jay car flipped and turned landing upside down. Glass and blood covered the ground.

**Jay's Last POV…**

My heart stopped as everything went in slow motion. The car flipped and rolled. Glimpse of memories that I had played over in my head like and old movie. Glass shattered everywhere. I couldn't feel anything, my Body was paralyzed. Once the car had landed upside down, I sat there and closed my eyes.

When I opened my eyes the brightness and warmth of the sun rested on my skin. I ran my fingers through the soft green grass I laid upon. Who knew the Kiss of death could be so sweet.


End file.
